Taking advice - Not always! Posted on 11 Feb 17:07 , 0 comments
We have all needed it
and we have all given it at some time in our lives. Have you noticed however that asking or taking advice can be a tricky thing to handle? In addition to the issue or subject that you are looking for advice about, you have to take into account the emotions of the giver.
If someone offers advice we often feel we have to take it. If we ask for advice we feel we have to take it. Advice however is only an opinion, suggestion or recommendation. They are not and never have been set in stone!
Many times I come across people who have taken advice, and acted upon it, even when their own gut instinct has been screaming for them not to. Going against your own instincts is usually rewarded with regret.
I learned pretty early
on in my practice days to bring in a qualifier to any asking of advice. I would ask for it, but also added “even though I am asking, I may not take your advice but I would be grateful for to hear it”. While people generally are taken back by that, it’s often better to get it out in the open as failing to do so can bring consternation to the giver, even causing possible long term damage to a relationship. So my advice would always be to qualify your request for any and all advice.
Sometimes however you may receive advice from a trusted, experienced older friend or colleague. There may be times when you just have to trust your instincts about the giver, rather than their advice. Older heads on older shoulders often see different perspectives, may have been in a similar situation at some time in their life. So then it’s a matter of balancing your trust in the individual, and your instincts towards the advice given. However remember whatever decision you ultimately make, you will have to live with it - it’s your life and your choice.
In my practice when I am counselling, I make it clear that it is not my job to tell my clients what to do. It’s my job to give them options of choice and considerations allowing them to make their own decisions. And the great thing about making choices and decisions is that the more you make the easier it becomes.
If you need advice for IBS, Anxiety, Insomnia, Stress, Chronic Pain or any other of my well-being programs please visit www.healthyaudiohypnosis.com though of course you don’t have to!